Nurses love telling stories, that’s for sure and it seems they have some stories to tell? If it isn’t an incident that happens at work, it’s something someone says or does. Or maybe it’s something you see at the bedside. A lot of times, it’s what nurses encounter with their patients. They come in with some crazy story or diagnosis, or some hectic symptoms or better yet, you witness something straight out of a movie that just shouldn’t happen in real life. But whatever the story, they add to the varied and crazy days of nursing life. No two days are ever the same.

The stories below were posted on Reddit’s nursing site in response to the question…

Does anyone have any good/funny/sad stories to share from when they were on the job?

 

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Allthefairiesaredead wrote:

In my first few months on the job, we had a man being held involuntarily in the ER, who managed to somehow get into the ceiling by lifting one of the panels and just climbing right on in. No idea how; it wouldn’t have been an easy feat, but I guess if you’re determined enough… We didn’t know this at the time, so naturally we all panicked, thinking he’d absconded.

The police were called. I remember we were having an awful night, and in the middle of everything, we hear a god-almighty crash. Turned out our patient who we thought was long gone was still in the ceiling, and had crashed down right onto the nurses’ station. You’d think this would slow him down, but you’d be wrong. Before any of us could react, he makes a break for the door, through a waiting room full of shocked onlookers (I should mention by this point he was naked), and away into the night he went.

I often wonder what happened to that guy.

tossmeawayagain RN – Home & Community takes the prize for craziest story.

As a student, placement in a geri-psych facility. Bathing a pleasant though very demented fellow with the help of a PSW (CNA for my American friends) student, I hear a yell for help from the next room, tell my PSW partner to stay and I go to help. Took five people to wrestle down a combative lady having a psychotic break. I turn to the person next to me after it’s all over to say thanks, and realise it’s my partner from the bath. She left our patient alone.

Dash back to the tub room and there’s our patient, naked and soapy in all his six-foot wrinkly glory, giggling. He takes off skating down the hallway, nurses and aides unable to grab him due to his soapy slick skin. Dangling testicles swinging for the world to see. He’s eventually caught in a bear-hug by the suit-wearing ward chaplain, and finishes the whole affair by taking a runny dump down his legs for good measure. Which my PSW partner later slips and takes a knee in. Because karma.

 

MyOwnGuitarHero Hospice contributed the following inspirational story:

I got very close to one of our cancer patients. She and my mom have the same type of cancer, and one of her daughters is also in nursing school. So, we really ended up bonding.

One day as I was lamenting nursing school, thinking that I wasn’t smart enough to hack it, she asked for a piece of paper, a pen, and a sandwich baggie. I gave her everything she wanted, and in about half an hour she calls me back in to the room.

She had taken the paper and ripped it into little strips. On each strip she wrote down one quality that she sees in me (kind, determined, smart, etc). Then she put all the pieces of paper in the baggie and called it “self-confidence on-the-go.” She told me that whenever I started doubting myself I should pull a piece of paper from the bag and know that at least one person out there sees that trait in me.

I cried. Like, ugly cried.

 

lingling2604 has some tales to tell about drug problems

I’ve got a couple, both about drugged-up, psych patients admitted to my floor for trauma. Both women in their 40s. I had these two patients in the same week admitted to the same room coincidentally.

First lady is lying in bed, looking crazily at the ceiling with a c-collar on. The trauma doc comes to see her and asks, “When was the last time you did meth?” The patient replies calmly while still looking up at the ceiling, “The last time was probably when I was still alive….” Dr. replies, “Weeellll you’re still alive, so when was it?”

“This afternoon.” Same lady called me a man-thieving witch and asked why I was drinking on the job.

Second lady was in her room while me and my tech were at the end of the hall whispering about her since she had said some interesting things when we were admitting her. We were standing probably a good 50 ft. away and just whispering. We walk by her room and she calls us in and yells, “YOU KNOW MY FIBROMYALGIA MAKES ME HEAR BETTER.” We were a little freaked out that she might have heard us somehow but then she said, “I KNOW MY FRIEND IS OUT THERE. I HEAR HER COUGH.” I had to assure her we weren’t hiding her friend and that the cough was from a 60-yr. old man with pneumonia.

 

cosmosoma has yet another crazy tale to tell:

While on my externship, a very manipulative 80-something woman (serious personality disorder) was admitted to psych after an overdose on Ambien. The resident went in to do the H&P, and was sitting very close to the patient.

The patient started doing this crying act, and the resident leaned in to console her. That’s when the patient whipped out a wet washcloth from behind and smacked the resident in the face.

The resident ordered a net bed restraint (think giant play pen, but closed on all sides). I was assigned first on observation. The patient proceeded to remove her hospital attire, scale the side of the net bed like Spiderman, and make hip thrusting motions at me. All while yelling at the top of her lungs, “Do you like girls? Huh? I’ll bet you like girls. ”

And that’s how I knew psych was the specialty for me.

Do you have any stories that would top these? Drop them in the comments below.

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